I gave up self-subverting thoughts
     Self: separate, me, that which knows
     Subvert: turn under, overthrow
As my Lenten (springtide) sacrifice:
    To make sacred (to set apart)
    As holy (heilagr) or reclaim whole

So... to stay upright and separate I have tried to more fully integrate

Mixed motivation complicates the task
Do I seek further separation
Or enhanced integration
Self-sufficiency or self-sacrifice

Is this self fulfilled through
More and more differentiation
Or enhanced assimilation, And
In either case: from/with what